Thursday, 2 January 2014

What I've learnt in 2013...

In the last year I've learnt lots of important things so here is a list of the most important things I've learnt:

  • Old people look young if they are happy. 
  • There is a place in Boston where everybody knows your name. 
  • There are pressure points in my hand. 
  • The NSA know if Area 51 is real. 
  • Other words for ginger include auburn, strawberry blonde and orange. 
  • The American Government shut down because they were all depressed that 'Breaking Bad' ended. 
  • I am secretly mocking people when I suck up to them. 
  • Nothing ruins comedy like arenas. 
  • The old cool is now uncool and vice versa. 
  • Orange is the new black. 
  • You can be clever as Voltaire but it won't get you nowhere if you want to sell disks. 
  • Just because you've had a crush on someone for a long time doesn't make it a good excuse for them to go out with you. 
  • Innuendoes and double entendre are different things. 
  • Everybody Lies. 
  • Everybody Dies. 
  • Ed Balls lives in a cul-de-sac with his Australian brother Harry. 
  • People at helium factories speak funny.
  •  Ben Maclean rhymes with margarine. 
  • May day is the new Christmas. 
  • Kevin is the American Keith and Jim is the American Tim. 
  • Atticus is a cool name. 
  • It's a long way to the top if you want to rock 'n' roll. 
  • Americans pronounce 'crisps' funny. 
  • I dislike small-minded idiots. 
  • Unhappiness causes people to do irrational things. 
  • French is hard.